25 - Past...

“For the first time in a long time, I wasn’t plagued by my past.  I was free of the torment of my crimes, my liquidation, my incarceration, and…” he paused and snickered.  “I was free from the abandonment of my family.” ​

Numbers 23:19, “God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind. Has he said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not fulfill it?” (ESV)

As he pondered this situation, Juan sobbed and said, “I almost ended it all yesterday.”  This statement seemed to bring everything to a still silence.

Juan gathered himself and said, “I know that sounds weak, but I did.  I walked all the way to the east bridge.  And as I went, all I could think of was how before I met you, I thought that my life couldn’t get any worse.  I’ve lost everything and everyone, I’m treated like a leper, and I’ve disgraced my family.  But, all of a sudden I meet you.”

Carlos was lost for words and appeared stunned.  Juan quickly replied, “You didn’t do anything wrong.  You had no idea she worked there and I didn’t either.”  Juan wiped tears from his face and said, “I thought meeting you was the biggest blessing of my life.  For the first time, in a long time, I felt like a human.  I talked like a human and was prepared to eat like a human.”

“For the first time in a long time, I wasn’t plagued by my past.  I was free of the torment of my crimes, my liquidation, my incarceration, and…” he paused and snickered.  “I was free from the abandonment of my family.” 

Carlos knew he was hurt; however, he couldn’t avoid the fact that there were questions that desperately needed answers.  He asked, “Why did you push her away?  I mean, at a time when you didn’t have anyone, why would you get rid of one of the few people, who was willing to stand by you in all of this?”

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