Post #15: 4 Reasons Why You Need To Deal With Your Low Self Esteem...

​This becomes tragic because the low self-esteem is also an arrogant presence.  It believes that the world and all those in it, focus on you.  If they’re laughing, they’re laughing at me.  If they’re whispering, they’re whispering about me.  

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​Now before I start, I want to be very honest with you.  In that, today is going to be a day of “tough love.” 
 
Personally, I am so anti-tough-love because it almost suggest that there are “other” levels of love.  Levels of love that lack what “tough-love” is infamously known for:  honesty.  Fact is, love is only love when it’s saturated in truth; however, I use the phrase today, so we can be on the same page. 
 
I’d also like to start this with a dose of sincere empathy.  Fact:  many who suffer from low self-esteem, can find its roots in the midst of some tough spots in life.  Some were abused mental, physically, verbally, emotionally, or sexually.  Some have been neglected and/or abandoned.  Some have suffered the trauma of infidelity and a host of other things.  Whatever the case, the insecurity that stems from low self-esteem, on most occasions, has its origins in the midst of some very difficult challenges.
 
However, today I’d like to do something that we rarely do.  I’d like to say, “Let’s just for a moment, forget HOW it came into our lives, and instead, let’s talk about WHY we have to address and overcome it.”  You see, dealing with the HOW can become a problem if it’s not in conjunction with confronting the WHY.  Truthfully, the HOW sells pity-party tickets, it enables the victim mentality, it gives us credence to be bitter, and worse of all it deceives us into the false notion that it’s unchangeable. 
 
However, none of that is productive nor is it positive.  Therefore, today I’d like for us to begin to dig for that part of us that’s desirous of overcoming this issue.  I think, it’s important to know that although this  is real and sincere, allowing a low self-esteem to remain unaddressed in your life, can cause many problems. 
 
Therefore, today we’ll talk about 4 reasons why you need to start dealing with your low self-esteem NOW:
 

• It’s self-sabotage:  In other words, your low self-esteem seeks to add negative interference into your very own life.  Consider this.  There’s talk of a promotion.  You have the skill to do the job and you’ve worked the time; however, none of that matters.  Why you ask?  Because there is a voice inside of you, that’s constantly tearing you down.  This voice is so pervasive that it’s deemed the professional evidence about your career to be a fluke.  Those facts don’t count because your negative view of self has a stronger effect on your life, than even truth does. 
• It makes you overly sensitive:   I mean, it’s only natural and inevitably next.  You see, if you believe that you have problems, then naturally, you’ll believe that others believe this about you as well.  This becomes tragic because the low self-esteem is also an arrogant presence.  It believes that the world and all those in it, focus on you.  If they’re laughing, they’re laughing at me.  If they’re whispering, they’re whispering about me.  This level of thinking begins to have negative impact on your relationships, and often times, is very much unsubstantiated and unfounded.   
• It keeps you isolated:  So, as time goes on, these thoughts then change the appearance of people.  People are no longer “like you”; rather, they’re now against you.  Thus, YOU don’t have a problem; instead, people are the problem.  This is a terrible thought because we all need human interaction.  If the low self-esteem screams that people are trouble, then soon I’ll avoid them altogether and miss my need for community.  Now, this won’t take away my loneliness; however, it will challenge my need to appropriately deal with loneliness.  Thus, giving me a view of life that’s puzzling at best. 
• It distances you from God:  Here is a God who says that He loves you.  That you’re special.  That you matter.  All the while, there’s a presence in your mind that says none of this is true.  And since none of these words are true, then maybe He’s not true either? 

 
You see, I get it.  I know that the low self-esteem is a real problem that stems from some real issues.  However, as much as I hate the hand life deals many of us, it is still incumbent upon us to play our hand nonetheless.  My challenge to you is to seek help and change.  Link with a good counselor, engage meetings with some of your church leaders, seek a prayer partner, engage the Word, have faith in who God made you to be.  Just (whatever you do) don’t stay there.  After all, if you don’t allow God to deal with this, it will CONTINUE to deal with you.
 
So, what did you think?  Was this helpful?  What did I miss?  Are you struggling with self-esteem?  Which point registered with you the most?  How did reading this make you feel?  What was the impact?  Let me know in the comments below.  Subscribe to the blog and thanks for your support. 
 
Imperfectly,
 
Kevin D. Jones, Sr.
(@kevindjonessr)