Does God REALLY Want us to Wait Until Marriage for Sex? (Post #72)

"As a society the proficiency of the lover, has grown almost higher than the efficiency of the love.  Sex has become more about individuality rather than intimacy. It's about performance and not purity."

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Warning: You're about to read an unpopular opinion.  This "opinion" is also absolute truth, but unpopular, nonetheless. 

The definition of "fornication" is "sexual intercourse between people not married to each other." 
 
Concerning fornication, the Bible says this in Hebrews 13:4, "Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge." (NKJV)
 
In the year 2020, sex is as societally commanding and culturally impacting as it's ever been.  You can hardly sell clothing without it.  You can barely promote films without it. It's long been a cornerstone in music sales, and it has left its mark on nearly every form of digital media known to man.  Not to mention that pornography is a thriving industry that makes well over $5 billion annually.
 
Sex sells. 
 
However, money is hardly the matter.  The monetary impact of sex is only a symptom of its literal one.  The literal impact of sex is its change.  Sex is culturally no longer what it was.  It has made a significant shift from its God-appointed purpose.  Today, it's hardly deemed a marriage thing.  I sadly say that it's becoming even less known as a love thing.  We tragically live in a world where finding an excellent lover, is prioritized higher than finding an excellent love.  

"In the year 2020, sex is as societally commanding and culturally impacting as it's ever been.  You can hardly sell clothing without it.  You can barely promote films without it. It's long been a cornerstone in music sales, and it has left its mark on nearly every form of digital media known to man."

This is without mentioning the heightened divorce rate, the commonality of infidelity, and the break from traditional values.  These factors have all made marriage as hard of a sell as a leather coat in the Sahara Desert.  A decreasing number of millennials want to be married, and even fewer think they should be married for life to one spouse.  However, everybody wants to have sex.  With a decrease in marital desire and a cultural increase in sexual appetite, this question remains high in society:
 
"Did God REALLY intend for us to wait for marriage before we have sex?" 
 
Well, the answer is simple, even if it's challenging in reception. 
 
The answer is yes.  Yes, God wants us to wait.  However, to appreciate God's position, you'd have to hear His directive with thoughtful consideration.  In other words, this can't be a lust conversation; instead, this has to be a logical conversation. 

"The answer is yes.  Yes, God wants us to wait."

Here are five reasons WHY God has ordained for us to wait:
 

• Loving God = Obeying God:  In 2020, there is a very misguided notion that suggests that anyone can love God and, at the same time, live any unapologetic life they'd like.  This is not true.  God is clear on His position of sex outside of marriage; it is an absolute sin.  1 John 1:6 says, "If we say that we have fellowship with Him, and walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth." (NKJV)  If honoring God is a priority in your life, then the decision is clear. 
• A Lack of Abstinence Amplifies a False Lack of Self-Control:  In the 21st century, sex has graduated to a place that's seemingly beyond our control. It's as if we can't say no. Indeed, one must be mindful of the positions that they place themselves in; however, we can never allow lust to rob us of all agency.  We can always elect to do the right thing.  After all, if it were impossible to say no, then sex would be the unconquerable sin.  And in Christ, no such sin exist (cf. Romans 8:1).
• What About The Kids:  Sex does not discriminate.  Sex between a husband and wife and sex consummated between 2 consenting adults who have "needs" can both result in pregnancy. Indeed, marriage by no means invites a child into an automatic healthy situation.  However, several undeniable repercussions accompany the bondless parental team.  At some point, in the midst of all this, I pray the children will be considered. 
• The Goal of Sex is Dying:  as we lose the heart of sex, we lose the honorable beauty that God had initially intended.  As a society the proficiency of the lover, has grown almost higher than the efficiency of the love.  Sex has become more about individuality rather than intimacy. It's about performance and not purity.  The badge of honor isn't the love shared but the size, skill, and stamina.  Sex then isn't about openness; it's almost the Olympics.  Certainly, the quality of the sexual relationship must matter.  However, it’s best to make love in the midst of real love. 
• STIs and STDs:  Absent integrity, this can most certainly negatively impact marriage.  However, where the marriage principle and God's plan are respected, STIs & STDs become near impossible.  

 
These are only a few; however, I know that the mismanagement of God's ordained sexual bond, has far more harmful impacts than meets the eye. 
 
Therefore, I conclude that God DOES want us to wait for marriage.  Not because He's unrealistic; rather, it's because He loves us unconditionally.   
 
Final Note:  You can’t do anything about yesterday.  However, you can work today, to ensure that you’re your best tomorrow. 
 
Your thoughts?  Let me know.  Comment.  Share.  Subscribe.
 
Imperfectly, 

Kevin D. Jones, Sr.

Author and Publisher of Perfectly Imperfect Perfectionist
(@kevindjonessr)
(@imperfection360)